Transcription:The Nerd in Oz
[The Nerd is in his bedroom, finishing a Wizard of Oz book] NERD: 'Man, I wish I could visit the Land of Oz. That would be so cool. Sooooo cooooool... Actually, it'd be much cooler to visit a topless beach in France. THAT would be so cool. Sooooo cooooool... falls asleep, we then see him run out of an old farmhouse '''NERD: '''Hello, French boobies! he's in the land of Oz Aw, dang it. '''MUNCHKIN: '''Put on these ruby slippers and follow the Yellow Brick Road. '''NERD: '''Do you have any roads that go to topless beaches? '''MUNCHKIN: '''Perhaps there are topless beaches in the Emerald City... b-but probably not. '''NERD: '''Can I tap these shoes together three times and wish... '''MUNCHKIN: 'at the same time as The Nerd To go to a topless beach? No! The story don't work that way, kid. then see the Nerd wearing drag walking down the Yellow Brick Road 'NERD: 'Unenthusiastically Here I am, having an adventure in the Land of Oz. Yay. Scarecrow appears '''SCARECROW: '''Well, hi-ya. My head is stuffed with straw. '''NERD: '''Hi, that's pretty neat I guess. himself Wait, this is my dream. So, if I want it to be super cool, all I have to do is dream it. Be super cool... Be super cool... Be super cooool... BE IT! just like that, the Scarecrow transforms into Eric Draven '''ERIC DRAVEN: '''I...seek...vengeance... '''NERD: '''Yes! and Eric come into contact with the Tin Man '''TIN MAN: '''If I only had a heart. '''ERIC DRAVEN: '''Take mine. It's brought me nothing but pain. '''NERD: '''Hang on, let me try something. Be super cool... Tin Man becomes Optimus Prime '''OPTIMUS PRIME: '''Let's transform and roll out and stomp a mud hole in some Decepticon ass so hard we won't stop 'till we're wearing socks made of dry shit! '''NERD: '''Oh, yes! then see the Nerd, Eric Draven, and Optimus Prime skipping down the Yellow Brick Road singing like a bunch of idiots, they then encounter the Cowardly Lion '''NERD: Singing La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la! Screwing along with my friends! COWARDLY LION: 'Rawr. I'm just a big old cowardly- '''NERD: '''BE SUPER COOL! Lion turns into Lion-O '''LION-O: '''Lion-O, leader of the Thundercats! Nerd giggles like a schoolgirl: meanwhile, the Witch is watching them through her crystal ball '''WITCH: '''Ohh, I must have those ruby slippers! '''FLYING MONKEY #1: '''Jeez, chicks and shoes. Am I right fellas? Ha! '''WITCH: '''Flying monkeys, bring me the Nerd and his pathetic friends! Nerd, Eric Draven, Optimus Prime, and Lion-O burst through her wall '''OPTIMUS PRIME: '''OH, YEAH! '''NERD: '''Hee hee hee hee! '''WITCH: '''What the FUCK? '''NERD: '''Did somebody order some ruby slippers? '''WITCH: '''Okay, fellas. Take it easy. '''NERD: '''Cause here's a special delivery... '''NERD, ERIC DRAVEN, OPTIMUS PRIME, AND LION-O: '''RIGHT UP YOUR ASS! '''WITCH: '''GET THEM! flying monkeys attack; Lion-O pulls out his sword '''LION-O: '''Thunder! Thunder! THUNDERCATS, HOOOOOOOOO! to attack the monkeys, but fails '''LION-O: '''Can't-quite--reach them. '''NERD: '''Keep saying "thunder"! '''LION-O: '''Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! spins his sword around like a tornado, effectively killing the monkeys '''LION-O: '''Ha, ha, ha, yeah! Thunder, thunder, thunder! Prime tries to shoot the monkeys, but fails '''OPTIMUS PRIME: '''They're too fast! '''NERD: '''Just transform, trust me! transforms, a trailer appears and kills a passing monkey '''OPTIMUS PRIME: '''Ha, ha, ha! Now that's just prime. '''NERD: '''Your magically appearing trailer irritated fans of the cartoon, but now it's your greatest weapon! repeats the transformation cycle twice '''OPTIMUS PRIME: '''Ten-four, good buddy. Yeah! In your grill! From the left! '''FLYING MONKEY #2: 'Eric Draven Ha, ha, ha! You'll never win! '''ERIC DRAVEN: '''It doesn't matter. Existence is nothing but frustration and pain. Everything you love eventually leaves you. Misery...is your only constant friend. '''FLYING MONKEY #2: '''You're right. himself wipes a tear from his eye; Nerd takes out the last two flying monkeys '''NERD: '''Smash! four boys back the Witch into a corner '''WITCH: '''Oh, oh. Come on, now, fellas, I was just playing around with that "kill them" thing. (chuckles) Let's just take it easy. '''NERD: '''Well, there are only two ways to kill a wicked witch, and I don't see any falling farmhouses around here. Hee hee hee hee hee hee! that, the four boys proceed to urinate on the Witch, thus causing her to melt '''WITCH: Oh, no! No! Nooooo! I'm Melting! Melting...melting.....what a world..... '''NERD: '''There's only one way this dream could get even better! they all arrive at - we guessed it - a topless beach in France '''NERD, ERIC, OPTIMUS, AND LION-O: '''FRENCH BOOBIES! YAAAY! Category: Transcriptions